Stanford Knight-Hennessy Scholars essay (denied)

Connect the dots. How have the influences in your life shaped you?

Composer Gustav Mahler lived a difficult life troubled by tragedy, an unrooted identity as a 19th-century European Jew, and unceasing struggles with bipolar disorder and schizophrenia; it was as if the “voices of two different people” lived inside the one Mahler. In his penultimate work “Das Lied von Der Erde” (“The Song of the Earth”), we hear these dueling voices guide us from a joyous drinking song through a melancholy meditation on solitude as we end in the lengthy epic “Der Abschied” (“The Farewell”). Here Mahler places us in a mystical trance as the orchestra carries a peaceful C6/9 chord into silence. In these final moments, we experience calm as if mirroring the same inner peace Mahler found in musical expression. That C6/9 chord was the last one I played as an orchestral violist on a professional stage. After a tumultuous high school journey defined by my own struggles with identity and academic failure, I found our performance of Mahler to be a fitting bookend to that chapter of my life. My decade of musical training gave me a reverence for artistic expression. Axiomatically, art is human-centered design in its purest form.

A SpaceX rocket requires parts from thousands of suppliers. Stuart is one of the purchasing
analysts who tackle this logistical challenge. Typically, he’d have to spend all day copy-pasting
dozens of documents into our company’s database. When I demonstrated my intern project to the
team, Stuart’s eyes lit up with joy as he saw an email automatically processed and recorded. We
freed Stuart from 30 hours/week of clerical work allowing him to put his analytical mind to work.
SpaceX was my first peek into how human-centered design can empower others to do more.
I’ve experienced time and again that caring about other folks’ needs and concerns is the key to
being truly useful to other people. This empathetic approach is why I ground every technical
discussion in the user experience. It’s seeing the delight in another’s eyes that brings energy to my
life. Human-centered design is the strongest way to help others.

When my sister turned around to face me, I saw Kamala Harris’ eyes staring back at me instead. We were watching the news together as Senator Harris gave her acceptance speech for the Vice Presidential nomination. My sister, 10 years my junior, shares similar facial features as the Senator. I was surprised that I had confused the person I had grown up with for a politician on TV. I let that disconnance sit in me for a moment. I had been running away from my identity as an Indian-American my whole life. Now, it felt like the last puzzle piece of my identity was beginning to fall into place. When I saw my sister and myself in Kamala Harris, I finally understood what many Black Americans saw in Barack Obama. I finally realized what “diversity” is all about: empowering everyone to feel like they belong in their community. To my sister I have an obligation to take my skills in human-centered design one step further by building and reforming the institutions that govern our life.

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I listened to Mahler the night after Harris’ acceptance speech. After another difficult journey through college, I felt the resolution in my heart that I had first felt five years ago on stage. I wrote to my closest friend: “This evening is the first time I felt like I really belong in this country. I didn’t realize how important it is to see yourself in your leaders.”